Tuesday, June 11, 2019

Self Doubt

I've been on a self growth journey lately. I have been reading a lot and doing a lot of self evaluating. This has helped me so much on my journey with depression. It's never easy to look at your self specifically and pick out your faults but it must be done. There's no way to get past our problems unless we face them.

I have found that reading (for me) is a huge help with keeping my mind right. I have alot of self doubt, I mean who doesn't right? Right now I'm reading the 5 second rule and I'm starting to figure out that alot of my self doubt comes from over thinking. I'm really trying to give this whole 5,4,3,2,1 GO a try. When I really think about it though, because I am, after all a habitual over thinker; I realize the things I'm really good at I don't think about at all, I just do it!

Where does this self doubt come from in the first place? I believe alot of times it comes from comparison. I whole heartedly believe that comparison is the theif of joy.
We all do it though, she's a better mom then me, she's smaller then me, she can buy whatever she wants, she's a better leader, she was promoted so fast....

The definition of self doubt is the lack of confidence in ones own abilities... Anyone struggling there?
I remember when I hit Silver for the first time with Young Living, I was like no way. This isn't me, I don't deserve this. What happens when my team realizes I'm not really a silver leader... Guess what? I started acting like I wasn't a silver leader... Then guess what? I didn't hit silver that second month. It's basically imposter syndrome, yes it's a real thing... I'd rather call it self sabotage though!

I'm basically a pro at self sabotage too.  It's like the minute I make a plan or goal, I inevitably self sabotage... This is also something I am working on... 2019 this is my year of growth I'm telling ya...

To me self sabotage along with self doubt can also have alot to do with what you feel your self worth is. It's almost like you have deemed yourself unworthy or the rank or the promotion or loosing the wait so you just prove all your fears right and either give up or never actually try. You won't admit this though right? Like, to others it's all like ahhh I'm reaching out and nobody writes me back or I'm eating really good I don't know what's wrong?!?! All while you are probably scrolling FB and liking peoples posts or doing that hide in the corner of your room with your oreos so you don't have to share with your kids...

The cycle has to stop somewhere guys, you have to decide you are worth it, because you are! You have to decide to change and act on it, because you can!

I highly recommend the 5,4,3,2,1... GO mindset for anyone struggling with self doubt and the seemed inability to do the little things!

You got this friends! I am rooting for you!!!


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